Monday, October 11, 2010

It never ceases to amaze me...

how little I can do to not only trust the Lord with my life, but then to live a life of obedience to the things that I have been made aware of and convicted by. I was telling Annie about a verse in Philippians that I was taking out of context but that did remind me that my stomach (or eating) was my idol, and she just said, "But you knew that." Why is it that things we have known or seen or heard so frequently fall off of our own radar but when we remember them again, its like the first time we have ever heard that. I have not been exercising or eating great since school started back and I am slowly gaining all the weight back that I lost this summer. It's hard for me to be something I am not, but whats worse its hard to live a way that I really do not desire either. I want the outcome but not the work. I want to product but not the process. And living healthy is not he only thing in my life that I fall into this pattern with. Even as I type this, I am forsaking my time with the Lord which will be much briefer sine I spent more time looking at the Internet this morning. My laziness, lack or discipline and self control is always bringing me and my family to places we have no desire to go. I do not want to remain here, but this is where I am.

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